Why You Feel You're Not Good Enough

This week I had some kind of horrible flu/cold (COVID test was negative) that took me down. It was the kind of sickness that forces you to stop and really rest. That’s all I could do.

Inside those couple of days where I stopped everything, that’s when I started to notice self-deprecating thoughts. You know, the voice that tells you you’re a piece of shit for not doing anything. The one that makes you feel even worse about yourself than the actual sickness. We’re so conditioned that being busy, productive, and proactive equals being a good person. You KNOW in your head that’s not true, but the thoughts are so ingrained and it definitely affects our bodies.

It’s so much pressure!!!

It’s so much pressure any time but especially when your body is trying to fight a nasty cold/flu.

So many of us were taught growing up that your value was based on what you accomplished in a day or if you did things well well. You may have received that message directly or indirectly. You had to get it right, do it perfectly, or do a lot in order to receive love.

Reminds me of this quote…

You’re not a human doing, You’re a human BEING.

Having to do more or be good at everything is very stressful for your nervous system. The pressure of perfection and productivity to prove your value takes away from you actually knowing yourself beyond what you accomplish. The truth is…

What you FEEL matters

And if you’re struggling with feeling anxious, overwhelmed, stuck, and having a hard time moving towards your goals, your beingness is trying to get your attention. Your beingness (ie nervous systems) is wanting the attentiveness it didn’t get from your caregivers. Attention not on what you do but on who you are.

This is a big part of doing somatic work because your nervous system patterns develop from how our caregivers showed us love and attention.

When you clear the anger, anxiety, and shame around not being good enough (because you don’t measure up to the productivity and progress goals you’ve created) you will be able to take action on your goals, feel creative, open, and available for connection with others in a fulfilling way.

Ready to reshape these patterns?

Reply to this email and schedule a 1 on 1 consult for private Somatic Experiencing sessions.  Let's get you moving towards how you truly want to feel in your life and moving towards your goals.

Or, join a Somatic Movement Class this week to add regulation tools and healthy movement to your life.

Recordings Available (send me an email)

With LOVE, Courage, and Regulation

Dorie

P.S. Read the last blog post How do I know if I’m over-giving vs being supportive?