How to Handle Stress

Election Stress

You did all the things:

-voted
-encouraged others to vote
-donated money

Now we wait. In the meantime, how do you live your life without feeling the incredible strain and stress of waiting for the results?

With stress levels rising, it’s important that you prioritize your health and wellness no matter what happens in this election.

Yes, there is a lot at stake!
Yes, it is a big monster deal.
AND
Yes, you can get through this week without sacrificing your emotional and physical health.

Some suggestions:

1. Decide how much you're going to check the news, social media etc. If you’re putting your emotional and mental health first, draw a line in the sand as to how much your body and brain can handle between now and Tuesday. Stick to your choice.

2. GAME PLAN - what else can you do on Tuesday to keep yourself occupied? Make a plan with friends to be outside, decide to watch a show, read a book, or throw a dance party in your living room.

3. Notice what’s happening in your body when you start to get freaked out by taking in too much info. Where do you feel it in your body, your chest, somewhere else?

4. When you feel that sensation that tells you you’re getting anxious or overwhelmed, orient to your space (like we do in class) or even look outside. Move your head, neck, and eyes together around your space. Name 5 things that you see (making sure to look behind you). Slow down and take your time naming the color and the name of the object out loud. You may notice your body shifting, your breath may change (deeper breaths or yawns are a good sign you’re downshifting), and/or you may notice your digestion shift a bit.

5. Engage your other senses, name 3 things you hear, or 3 things you feel your body touching. Other ways to engage your senses are to take a luxurious bath or a slow shower noticing how the water feels on your body, get outside, draw a picture…OR

   Join a somatic movement class this week and let someone else lead you. We can get through this together!

Each somatic yoga movement class includes:

~nervous system regulation exercises (creates a feeling of safety)
~tracking your own nervous system
~yoga poses and breathing
~alignment that is functional and can be used in all areas of your life
~deep rest

Carve out space to develop a connection to your nervous system this week.

Classes this week:

Monday 6-7 pm CST (YOGA)
Wednesday 9:30-10:30 am CST (BOW SPRING)
Friday 12-1 pm CST (YOGA)
Saturday 10-11:15 am CST (YOGA)

Register at www.doriesilverman.com/classes

Can’t make a live class?
All classes are now recorded. To receive a recording of a class, register for the class, and then send me an email or text letting me know you’d like the recording link. It will be available for 24 hours.

Register here for classes
And check out the resources and testimonials below.

I'll see you on the mat!

With Love and Regulation

~Dorie

P.S. Are you looking for more individualized one-on-one support for anxiety, depression or overwhelm? Let’s chat

Grief - We Need to Talk About It

Sometimes grief hits you when it's not convenient.  

Tomorrow is my mom's yahrzeit (the anniversary of someone's death in the Jewish tradition) and it would be so much easier if I could just light the yahrzeit candle, say the prayers and decide I'll be sad from 7-9pm.  That was my plan anyway.

But it's happening RIGHT NOW.

I've been feeling anxious and angry a lot today.  I thought it was because I'm on a deadline, have a lot of behind the scenes scheduling, emails, writing, organizing, planning to do.  I thought it was just me being overwhelmed with life.

I realize now that my body is remembering the loss.  I feel it now in my heart just as I did before, during and after her death.  That first round of heartache lasted for 6 months after she died. The physical heartache that originates in the center of my chest and radiates out.  It's dark, heavy and unmovable. When I feel it I see the shape of a large spider, legs coming out in every direction.

Grief is ugly, complicated, messy, raw, painful and difficult to hold alone.

While I will welcome the love and support that I know I will receive from this post, that is NOT why I'm sharing this with you.

I'm sharing this with you because I don't want to hold it alone.  I'm sharing this with you because grief is not something that we typically talk about or share with one another.  It is a very private experience. We want the emotions of grief to just come when someone dies and get it over with and hope that it won't return.  But it DOES return over and over again. I've talked to so many people who have lost a parent, especially my mom's friends. Every single one of them has shared with me that 15, 20, 30+ years after their loved one has passed, they still feel the loss.  It never fully goes away.

And yet, we're not talking about it.

We're sweeping it to the side, burying our pain like their bodies in the ground.  We bury it so that we don’t make each other uncomfortable or sad. So that we’re not pitied.  So that we don’t have to face how fucking painful it is. Unfortunately, what I know as a somatic therapist is that the emotion that is not experienced to completion doesn't decompose like a buried body but rather becomes stuck in our tissue eventually becoming some autoimmune disease, chronic pain or illness that we can't come back from.

We NEED to talk about it.

At some point, we are ALL going to experience loss of someone we love.

Grief comes in many ways.  It comes in the form of physical pain, anger, confusion, utter dismay, fear of more loss and fear of our own death.  It also comes in the form of hope, motivation, being present more often and being more focused on what we really want.  It forces us to feel our lives right now and to remember the sacredness of every moment. Especially when your heart is crying out from loneliness and sadness that no one can take away.

When you are feeling this, you need to talk about it.  With a therapist, with the ones you love. Talk to your kids, friends, family members, teachers, pets, the tree in your backyard.  Let's share this very real part of being alive. Not to dwell on it, but to remember the sacredness of life and the loss that comes with it.  

We NEED to talk about it.

We need to talk about letting go of everything that we lost when their body stopped breathing.

Last night my sis and I made a list of all of the good things we remember about my mom. Our list includes lots of memories, her cute little dance moves, the way she ordered at restaurants, the way it felt when she put her hand on my face and called me my nickname, how cute and happy she got after a few sips of alcohol. (cut to pic to the left)

Because my mom was an expert in the kitchen and taught me so much about cooking, I regularly think of her and talk to her when I’m in the kitchen making food for the week or trying some new recipe.  

We also need to talk about the ways that they are still alive.  Perhaps it's seeing their smile in another person’s face or if its a parent perhaps you hear their laugh when you laugh.  

We NEED to talk about it and we need to FEEL it.

Last time I held her hand.

I had other plans for tonight.  But then grief came to visit. So, I will sit with this feeling.  I will place my hands on my heart and tell this part of me that I am here, that I love her and that we will get through this together.  I will talk to my mom and tell her that I'm listening just in case she has something to share with me. I will hold myself with compassion and care as I sift through the long slow moments of sadness.  I will feel that sadness in my body and let that energy move and transform into other sensations and emotions.  I will consciously remember all that my mom gave me when she was alive. Most importantly she gave me LIFE. I will remember what it felt to be held by her or to have her grab my hand as we walked down the street together. 

That's the thing I miss the most...

Transforming Fear

A few nights ago, I walked to a friend's house to pick up Gracie.  it was a beautiful night, about 50 degrees which felt delightful for winter in Chicago.  Trotting along, I enjoyed and breathed in the fresh air, listened to singing birds, and excitedly envisioned Gracie's little head in my hands kissing her sweet face too many times. She's so so delicious.  I love it when she sees me for the first time and squeals when she realizes who I am.  Oh, be still my heart.  

It was 10ish pm and I began to feel that fear that usually comes when I'm walking alone late at night.  Within seconds I was enveloped by the cold vulnerability that sends chills through your veins. Then the visions of being attacked filled my body mind.  Unfortunately, a commonplace feeling for most women.  

In an instant my enjoyment and appreciation of the moment vanished.  I began to breathe. I slowed my pace and felt my breath expanding so that I could feel my ribs and lungs opening against the  band of my bra.  Then, I began to take the shape (The Bowspring) that I've been practicing for the last year and a half.  I breathed my ribcage and heart full. Then, with each step I pulled back with my feet so that my glutes and hamstrings starting working too.  I floated my heart away from my pelvis, lifted my chin and began to visualize the shape of my body.  I learned at InVision the energy school in Lakeview, that you can fill your body in with your own gold life energy to replenish and rejuvenate.  So, in visioning my shape, I poured in a gold shimmery color so that my mind began living into my body with a feeling AND an image.  

With each empowered step, feelings of bone chilling fear began to shift into feelings of courage, lightness and power. I felt that I could take care of myself.  Not a vulnerable little waif of a human, but, a solid and powerful creature moving upon the earth.  Even after 15 years of practice, again, I'm reminded of the incredible POWER of the awareness on the body.  

The Bowspring Method has become so much more than a way to strengthen and heal my body. It has become a way to live this life from a brand new perspective.  While all of my training has taught me that the form we take affects our perspective and mood, feeling it fascinates the shit out of me and inspires me to share this with as many people as I can.  

How would you live differently or who would you be if you approached yourself and your life from feeling courageous, strong, agile, able, light, upright, open in your bodymind?  How would your relationships change? 

Join me for Bowspring in a class, intensive workshop or private lesson