Emotional Tools You Can Trust

Like me, you've read a million books on self-care, self-help, self-love, self-improvement, spirituality, etc.  You've probably tried every diet and seen therapists and psychiatrists.  You've done women's circles and yoga retreats.  You've tried the things and you know what to do.

Yet, something is still off.  You're still reactive, anxious, overwhelmed, stuck in fear, or stuck in old patterns. 

After doing all of that work, spending so much time and so much money trying different therapies, and then finding yourself feeling the same way, it’s hard to trust in the tools you've learned.  Or perhaps you're just so damn tired of trying.

I get it and I'm with you.

This time of year is so emotional, with the holidays and increased family time,  a lot of emotions you may have been able to glide through the rest of the year get kicked to the surface.  Especially if you've lost a loved one in your life.  Traditions and memories can bring back the many emotions of grief (anger, resentment, fear, sadness, fondness, love, loneliness). 

It's a lot to handle on top of all of the other stress you're nervous system is under living at this time (cue:  the pandemic, social unrest, racism, sexism, etc).

I take refuge in the somatic tools that I can rely on during this time of year.  It is so empowering to know you can build resilience and surf the emotions that arise.  I searched for these tools for so long and now that I've found something that works, I want to share that with you.  I know you can feel that empowerment too.  You can have tools that you rely on that actually work to help you to feel present, at ease, and wanting to connect with the people in your life.

When we work together we custom build a toolbox for you.  You'll have somatic exercises to build resilience.  You'll also have tools you can use when you're with other people and you get triggered or overwhelmed.  What a relief. 

If you are resonating with this I invite you to reply to this email to book a 30-minute complimentary consultation with me for private work.  Sessions are online.

And, join a Somatic Movement (movement +nervous system regulation) class this week.
With LOVE, Courage, and Regulation
Dorie

P.S.  Read last week’s blog post I know you know

I Know You Know

Hello Friend

Honestly, it’s very challenging to write about nervous system work because so much of it is about experiencing what's happening inside, which is very different from reading about it, thinking about it, or knowing what to do.

I find that a lot of my clients know these concepts.  You most likely do too.  You know that trauma (aka stuck stress-energy) is in your body and it's limiting you from feeling connection, feeling curious, and fully alive.  When you're in that overwhelm, anxiety, anger, rage, dissociation, and chronic sadness, you know that you need to learn how to regulate and feel these emotions to completion. 

I know you know!

And you may even give this advice to your friends when they come to you for support.

As a lovely woman said to me the other day, "I don't practice what I preach".

When I say practice I don't mean meditation or yoga or going to talk therapy.  I don't mean knowing where your emotional patterns/addictions come from or being able to rationalize yourself out of feeling bad in the moment.  Those are all amazing things, but they are different than working with your nervous system's cues and reshaping how you respond to stress. 

Also, who the hell wants to feel the volcano of anger, sadness, grief and longing that is brewing inside.  NO ONE.  And your nervous system is going to do anything it can to keep you from feeling those things because it's scary, it's big and you don't know how to do it in a way that will complete those feelings.  You're afraid you're going to hurt someone or yourself.  It's too much and frankly, you'd rather just eat a box of cookies (insert your favorite emotional avoidance tool here) and move on.  Which, by the way, just increases the intensity of these emotions over time.

And it's not your fault.  No one has taught us how to do this, it's not supported in our current lifestyle, our parents didn't know how and it wasn't taught in school.  If I'm being totally honest, that's where we should have learned it. 

No worries babe, I got chu.

Life is stressful and complicated right now.  And it's only going to continue to be strange and uncertain.  We need these tools.  It's time.  In fact, it's way overdue.

Because we're working with the nervous system it is the most foundational place to create lasting change. 

If you are resonating with this I invite you to reply to this email to book a 30-minute complimentary consultation with me for private work.

And, join a Somatic Movement (movement +nervous system regulation) class this week.

With LOVE, Courage, and Regulation
Dorie

P.S.  Read last week’s blog post I can't be consistent

I Can't Be Consistent

I’m thinking a lot about consistency.  How can I stay consistent with the things that I want to do, (having fun, working out, hydrating enough, regulating my nervous system, getting work done, etc).

What's clear is we each have an upper limit to how much we can handle in a day.  Whether it’s what you’re doing, what you’re experiencing, or what you’re feeling.  You have a limit on hard stuff as much as you have a limit on enjoyable experiences.

So the big question is...How much is enough?

This is big! It’s big because your mind will tell you, “that’s just a visit with friends, you should love that, you should do that”.  Or, “why am I so exhausted, all I did was go to the grocery store and one other errand”. 

Not to mention our culture which promotes a constant go go go, more-is-better lifestyle.  

And finally, your mom/caregivers probably modeled the do it all/have it all approach to life.

All the while, your BodyHome is begging for rest and a vacation. Your body lets you know this in the form of pain, an upset stomach, headaches, all-over body pain, anxiety, chronic anger or irritation, etc.

We are all handling so much stress from our personal histories, the pandemic, and generations of racial and social inequities.  Let's acknowledge that individually and collectively we’re handling a lot right now and what’s needed are strategies to clear stuck stress and reclaim the vitality, creativity, and connection that’s inside you ready to emerge.

Exploring your limits is what nervous system work is all about.  And when you get in tune with your limits, you can craft a life that includes all that you want to do to take good care of yourself without burning out and feeling crushed by yet another failed attempt.

You can learn more about what nervous system work feels like here.

Ready to reshape your nervous system, feel in control of your emotions and feel like yourself again?

Contact me to schedule a complimentary 30-minute consult here.

Or, join a somatic movement class here.

With LOVE and Regulation~
Dorie